Dear Younger Self: Hey Spencer!

 

Dear Young Spencer,

I am more than excited to write this letter to you. Many days have passed since I last wrote to you and though I had made a promise to keep writing, times and seasons have not allowed. I have experienced a lot in both joy and sorrow, and I hope that this letter will serve to you as a reminder of the victory that awaits you ahead.

I took a walk today and as I passed by a group of people at the bus stop; a certain familiar fragrance filled my nostrils. It brought memories upon memories about you and I could even bet that you are wearing that perfume right now. I know you enjoy that scent so much, not because of how hard you saved your high school pocket money to afford it, but because it was the first thing that spoke about you finally getting to adulthood. And isn’t that what you longed for all along? In a few years, you will experience the world of more, and you will realize that the world is not in short supply of amazing fragrances.

Now that we are speaking about scents, as you discover more, give your soul and spirit grace to metamorphosize to something beautiful. A remarkable scent to the world that will be felt wherever you go.  Everyone desires a good fragrance in their life, but you can not give on the outside what is not on the inside. Desire early to have the full fruit of the Spirit which is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self-control. (Galatians 5:22) Your fragrance must be built of good character, virtue and warm-heartedness.

Since we have known each other for all our lives, you understand that I am a woman of few words. So rather than give you tales of what to expect, let me provide you with pointers that will help guide your journey to great fulfilment.

1. Live for purpose

Acts 13:36: “ Now when David had served God’s purpose in his own generation, he fell asleep…”

What a great way to summarize the life of David, a life well-lived. Desire to live God’s purpose in your life. I see your struggle in trying to discover what that means but begin by praying to God to open your eyes to see where he is at work around you and make the decision to join him. Along the way, he will open your eyes to see the specific areas of purpose that he has assigned for you. As Oprah Winfrey said, “There is no greater gift than to honour your life’s calling, the reason you were born. Only then do you become most truly alive.” Live alive!

Do not allow fear to get you stuck. The longer you stay stuck, the harder it will be to get out. Listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit, he will lead you in the right way. Believe in yourself and in God’s big and amazing plan for your life for he has empowered you to do all things through Christ that strengthens you. (Philippians 4:13)

In living your purpose seek after God with all your heart, soul and mind. Life will present you with surprises. Sometimes joyful ones, other times an avalanche of sadness, he will be the only firm foundation that you can depend on. Allow yourself to be built in Him.

2. Know your lane and keep at it

I have seen your struggles all through high school as you tried to fit in. Having been raised in the countryside and going to a city school was all too complicated for you. You struggled to make friends and to keep up with the trends. But I love that you never allowed yourself to lose you. In your future years, you will get to appreciate that decision. So keep being you, everyone else is taken. You are uniquely you, work to live life like no one else but you.  Consciously know and understand your character, your feelings, motives and desires. When you have a better understanding of yourself, you will be able to live and experience life on your own terms. You will then be empowered to make changes and to build on your areas of strength as well as identify areas where you would like to make improvements.

Remember how everyone has an opinion of how your life should be lived, listen to them with a pinch of salt. Pick graciously what is worth a second glance and move on without apology. Allow God your creator to have the final say in the blueprint of your life.

3. Know your tribe

The world is full of different types of people. You have already begun to meet them. You will meet even more as you go along. Please get to know your tribe. When I say tribe, I do not mean the people you're linked to through blood-ties, culture or language. I mean your gang. Your sounding board, your cheering team, your ride or die partners. This life is about fellowship, partnerships and friendships.  Differentiate your friends for a season and those for a lifetime. Each of them will have a role that the other cannot play. And when the seasonal ones move on, appreciate the experiences and love they brought and move on too. Celebrate your lifetime friends, let them know what they mean to you. I have met some pretty amazing ones on this side of life. I know you will meet and love them too. I could tell you their names, but that would destroy the element of surprise.  Be genuine and authentic in all your relations. And if they are true and you are true too, you will always have a seat at the table.

In learning your tribe, you will also appreciate that family is everything. They will be constant in your life while all else changes. Love them, treasure them. Don’t be afraid of the drama that comes with building your life around them. It was with great wisdom that God didn’t give us the choice to choose them. And when you learn to love them unconditionally their full value and flavour will be revealed in your life.

4. Love easily, forgive quickly

It is said that "love makes the world go round" and certainly round it goes. You will experience this when you begin to meet people and to fall in love. Whether it’s a new love or decades-old love, whether it’s in romance or in friendship, love will bring the spice to your life. Give love but also be ready to receive it. Lose every weight and baggage that defines you as unworthy of love. You are worthy of all of it, in all measure. If you find someone you love in your life, do not be afraid to hang on to that love. Water it and nurture it. You never know what it may turn out to be. I can tell you from my experience on this side of life, that you will meet incredible people. Funny, loving, generous, outgoing, visionaries etc. Whether a love life with them works out or not, while at it enjoy the moments.

There are no guarantees in life, so let me also prepare you for some heartbreaks. Some you will be able to foresee, and others will happen to you at the least expected time and in the least expected way. They will leave you wounded, in pain and more often angry at the person and at the prospects of what you thought it could have been. I know it will be difficult to rise again, but it will not be an impossible task. To prepare you for that moment in time, begin to learn to forgive easily. Sometimes it will mean forgiving even when you don’t understand what went wrong or when no apologies have been offered. Be good and kind to yourself and know that no experience is ever wasted.

 

Young Spencer, I could speak of so much more but let me leave you with these few pointers for now. The future is bright. Don’t be afraid of experiencing every bit of it. We are in this together. Cheers to a wonderful life ahead.

 

Much love,

Older Spencer.

 

Letter by Shiku Murathime a.k.a Spencer
Shiku is a born again Christian and a life influencer who is passionate about relationships and building authentic friendships. Her hobbies include; hiking, reading( all types of books), teaching and events planning. She is a firm believer in pursuing her God-given life purpose and encourages everyone to do the same through her platform - "the keeper"(Y'all gotta check it out!!!) If you'd love to reach out to her; send her an email at  shikuchick@gmail.com.